Alcohol and mental health – a journal entry

This was posted by an alcoholic in recovery about his life with mental health problems and alcohol use.**

(I suffer from Major Depression/Anxiety/Fibromyalgia and I'm posting some journal entries as a means of healing myself by sharing and to help those that suffer with mental illness. And also to those that don't understand what we deal with day in and day out. Empathy goes a long way.) (***this was written when while I was self medicating and self destructing with alcohol. I have not had a drink since Dec. 2014) Sometimes alone is better Sometimes being lonely Hurts like hell I stayed up late and looked at photographs And remembered Why I'm a lot better off The ringer on the phone is shut off It stopped ringing long ago anyway The empties by the sink Tell the tale of a man Whose seen some better days Stopped trying to try Told myself I'll get by Give me just another day The thread's been pulled to thin And it's ready to break I guess I'm just used to it this way a man can only sink as low as the hole he dug will allow Run away run away run away run away Can't seem to apologize For all the things I say This Broken back These tired limbs Sheets soaked with sweat These unpaid debts This never ends It never ends This never ends It never ends Just leave me be Wherever I black out

** With thanks to "M.M." who gave me permission to reproduce his journal entry. He did so hoping others may find comfort in his experience.